UFOs, in general, don’t really scare me. This is probably because I have never been abducted and had weird tests performed on me. I’ve loved UFOs ever since I was a little kid. While other kids were dreaming about being kidnapped or being chased by scary aliens, I was having dreams where I willingly got into a UFO and I waved happily to my mom as I flew off. There will be a time when I discuss the complexities of UFO sightings and the baggage that comes along with abductions. For now, I’ll just stick to the basic definition of a UFO: something weird flying in the sky.
There are the fundamental shapes that everyone knows and sees; you’ve got the saucers, the triangles, the boomerangs, the balls of fire, and the cylinders. There are other shapes, obviously, but those aforementioned styles are a good place to start. I really don’t need to mention much about the common UFO shapes. We’ve all heard the stories, and, if you haven’t, let me know and I can fill you in. I just want to say that a true UFO is certainly odd looking, but it only becomes remarkable when it performs impossible maneuvers that no known earthly aircraft could possibly handle. They switch direction at impossible speeds while sometime floating perfectly still in the air, you know, signature UFO stuff. I would like to talk about all of this and pose some of my theories at a later date. Then what the heck am I talking about if I keep postponing subjects, you may ask. Today I am going to discuss a rather new aerial phenomenon. It’s been caught on tape, it’s mostly seen in Mexico, it scares the living daylights out of me; I’m talking about the flying humanoid phenomenon.
The proverbial swarm of flying humanoids seemed to swoop onto the scene around the year 2000. A seasoned UFO hunter, Salvador Guerrero, was doing his normal sky watching thing in March of 2000 in Mexico City. That evening, or morning, or whatever, he had a UFO encounter. That in itself is pretty exciting, so Guerrero pulled out his video camera to tape the dark, flying object. When he zoomed in, something was definitely different about this one. The object seemed to have arms and legs. The video is quite remarkable, it shows this thing dangling in the air for a few moments, spinning slowly, then moving, and finally disappearing behind a building. What? That sounds really spooky. A guy twirling and flying around in the air? I can’t even begin to conceive what that would be. Okay, maybe I can. But it doesn’t end there, not at all, apparently, this wasn’t the first flying humanoid to be caught on tape! A friend of Guerrero, Amado Marquez, filmed a very similar thing in February of 2000. He caught what he initially thought to be a routine UFO, but instead discovered a man type figure, with legs spread, flying horizontally. Just skydivers, you say? No parachutes were visible, and the movement patterns don’t look like a skydiver I’ve ever seen. Most people who skydive don’t usually stand straight up, move in a steady horizontal position, and they don’t not have a parachute. The saga continues; July 2000 in Cuernavaca, Morelos, another sky watcher witnessed a distinctly humanoid figure flying around before descending behind a hill. In October that same year, a pilot saw a little guy with a back pack on flying at the same altitude as the plane. This could have been a skydiver, except for the fact that it was “flying freely”, not falling. The scariest one, in my opinion, occurred on February 14, 2004. Three people filmed this one in Mexico City. At first the object looked like a big, black mass, but as things became clearer, a noticeably humanoid object was seen, and above it seemed to be a vibrating structure. They remained stationary for a while, and it was at first thought to be a strange helicopter. That is, until a small object flew into view and appeared to be absorbed by the humanoid. And then, the really crazy things started to happen; the whole contraption split apart. The humanoid creature flew off while wearing what looked like a cloak. And that vibrating thing it turned out to look like some kind of vibrating winged being. I will discuss the possible implications of this later on.
I can’t talk about flying humanoids in Mexico without discussing the witch incident. Very early in the morning on January 16th, 2004, a very adorable policeman was making his rounds. So he turns on this one street and he sees a large, black mass fall from a tree. The strange thing was that this object stopped and hovered before hitting the ground. The object revealed itself to be what seemed to be a female, dressed in all black, with big black eyes, and no discernable eyelids. This thing was upset about being caught in the headlights and immediately flew at the police car, trying to break through the windshield and get at the poor, frightened policeman. As this witch thing, with her leathery, dark brown skin and terrifying expression continued to try to get into the car, the police officer called for backup and passed out. He woke up and the creature was still there, so he passed out again. He was found by two other police officers, he was unconscious and unhurt. This is due to the fact that the policeman never tried to exit his car. When the officer came to, he was completely in shock as he rattled off his story. He was later given drug and alcohol test, but they came back negative. It doesn’t end there. After this experience, it came to light that two other police officers saw the exact same creature a couple of days before the attack.
Alright, now that we have all of that out of the way, let’s take a breather, and absorb these utterly bizarre stories. So flying people, eh? Seems pretty farfetched and something that could be easily mistaken for something else. However, what out there looks like flying people? Why are they primarily seen in Mexico? Do they have flying people technology that the world doesn’t know about? Do a lot of jet packs exist in Mexico, and if so, how do those ones work when no one else in the world can make a really good one? And why, why are they so freaking scary?
I guess I find them scary because they aren’t the good old UFOs I grew up with and came to know and love. They’re different and much more personal. Instead of just a mysterious, flying object, you’ve got a being, that you can see, and look into the eyes of. That’s creepy! And while aliens in spaceships have to do a little work to abduct you, what stops flying humanoids from simply scooping you up and flying off with you?
The freaky thing to me is their flying methods. While some seem to be relying on mechanical devices to fly, others seem to be doing so on their own accord. Maybe they’re wearing anti-gravity suits or something. That, or we have supermen among us. This makes me wonder, is it technology or magic? Technology is definitely the clear choice. There is a lot more evidence of technology than of magic. You can learn about technology in college courses, but they don’t yet teach magic. So if it is technology, it’s well beyond the scope of everyday human technology. Oh yes, we have jet packs now, but in all reality, they totally suck. No real longevity, no towering heights, they’re bulky, noisy, and obviously jet packs. They are usually tethered to the ground to keep them from spinning out of control. Very few people actually own jet packs, and not all of them are in Mexico. To be fair, yes, some are in Mexico. So now we are left with three kinds of technology; secret government technology, alien technology, and government technology stolen from aliens. Now, I believe that most UFO sightings are of secret government test aircraft. So, flying humanoids could very well be a product of this. Imagine a war where soldiers could fly, and mow down those poor suckers on the ground with like, a machine gun or something. The first army with that capability would have a huge advantage over other armies. So obviously, the public wouldn’t know about it yet. It’s a secret! Or it might just be aliens. Perhaps flying around without spacecraft is supposed to be more covert. Well, maybe, as many flying humanoid sighting as there are, think about how many flying humanoids that might be out there that we aren’t seeing. Maybe flying around is a better way to get, you know, like soil samples or something. It could be a better way to observe weather conditions, wind directions, and those frightened little people scurrying about on the ground. If these things are alien technology, they may be some form of flying probe that just happens to look like a humanoid. The human race is so conceited that it mistakes antennae on probes for arms and legs. Or, just maybe, it’s a more cost effective way to get to Earth. Just send one flying alien out here instead of an entire spaceship. And finally, there is the stolen alien technology by the government theory. That really explains itself. It’s a mix between government technology and alien technology. This means that our governments are reverse engineering captured or crashed alien spacecraft, or the world governments are in cahoots with aliens and they’re all working together to get people to fly and freak out civilians in Mexico.
What if there is something darker and more sinister going on? I’m not going to say magic. Because though I see the world as a magical place; I don’t light candles, pray to Gaia, try to cast love or revenge spells, listen to dark and brooding music, think the world is out to get me, or practice free love in magic circles. I do, however, believe in high strangeness. Saying that, there is something witch-like about these flying humanoids. In medieval up to colonial times, witches roamed the earth, summoning the devil, hanging around with black cats, and being old and owning property that someone else wanted. You know, usual witch stuff. Many have suffered and died during these witch crazes. You know how it is, it takes one witch to ruin things for the rest of us. I used to think that people thought witches flew on broomsticks because it was a very sexist world back then, and even the freest witch woman in the world was still tied to her household duties via her broom. I am not one to ever discount human ingenuity or imagination; but what it, during these crazy witch hunting times, a few flying humanoids showed up and further enforced the whole evil thing. Just imagine, you’re about to burn a woman for being a witch, and a flying person just happens to buzz overhead, well, wouldn’t that confirm your beliefs? Okay, so there may have been flying humanoids way back when, and then they went away for a long time and then reemerged in 2000? Have the witches returned? That poor police officer certainly thought he was attacked by a witch. But what is a witch? In modern times they’re angry young women with damaged hair, black fingernails, and will someday show those jerks who teased them who has the real power. A few hundred years ago, they were older women who usually lived alone and practiced natural medicine. But I wouldn’t really call either of those kinds of people a real witch. There’s no real magic there, I’m pretty sure. Is there real magic anywhere? Or is it all just something we don’t understand? You know what I think? Monsters. There have been sightings all over the world of winged monsters. The mothman, the birdman, Batman. So maybe there are no aliens, no technology, just monsters. That would tie up things nicely, wouldn’t it? But everything in the paranormal realm has fuzzy boundaries. One explanation does not make a rule. That creature that attacked that cop, by the descriptions could be categorized as an alien, monster, or a demon. I certainly don’t think it was any kind of human.
So, once again, what have we learned? Nothing? Probably. I just know that if some flying humanoid comes near me, I’m running, and I won’t be ashamed to push others out of the way.
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